Marital Rape Lie Refuted!!!

ISLAM is a religion of peace, and honours women.There are many hadees about the good treatment of women.

But, Unfortunately some Islamophobes argue that ‘since it is obligatory for a women to respond to her husbands call to have sex ,they can force their wives to have sex with them if they refuse their request’.

This is wrong and this sort of behaviour has no place in Islam!

Now let’s Refute their weak argument and explaining the hadees in question:

#Hadees-1.

Talq bin Ali narrated that The Messenger of Allah said:
“When a man calls his wife to fulfill his need, then let her come, even if she is at the oven.”[Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1160]

Where on the earth does it say about marital rape!!!
This hadith does imply that she must go.And also, this hadith does NOT IMPLY that he can then harm her if she does not go. It does imply that she is obligated to assist him. Generally this hadith is translated as “to satisfy his desire”. That is improper translation. It is a general hadith, literally, inferring any need he has which could include; fixing something, helping in a needed project etc. Again, this hadith does not say anywhere within it that he is allowed to then force himself in a harmful physical manner upon her if she refuses.

So, that’s it folks.This hadees doesn’t say Husband to forcefully have sex with his Wife.

#Hadees-2.

Now,there is another Hadees Islamophobes claim that it calls for marital rape is:

Narrated Abu Hurraira:Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said, “If a husband calls his wife to his bed (i.e. to have sexual relation) and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the angels will curse her till morning.”
[Sahih al-Bukhari 3237] [Book 8, Hadith 3368 Sahih Muslim].

Now, Does the above Hadees mean the husband can force his wife into sex/marital rape ? The answer is NO!!

Nowhere in the hadees, is the husband giving any right to force his wife into sex, instead the hadees clearly mentions, that when the husband spends the night in anger [this is another proof that makes clear that a husband can’t force his wife to have sex, because how can a husband spend the night in anger sexually depressed, if he had the right and could force his wife to fullfill his sexual needs?? This clearly poofs that a Muslim husband doesn’t have the right to force his wife into sex with him] ,the angels will curse his wife [will curse is meant: Allah swt wont hear or answer her prayer till the morning] , so the punishment for the wife’s sin is clearly mentioned in the hadith, the angels will curse her [her prayer won’t be heard by Allah swt] , no where does the hadith gives any idea of forcing or physical punishment. The wife clearly knows that she is wrong, when she rejects her husband request (she should fullfill his sexual needs). But the husband can’t compulse or force his wife into sex/marital rape. The husband has the right to insist that she should fullfill his right, and the husband has the right to be angry at her for this (in a proper way), however he still hasn’t the right in Islam to force her into sex/marital rape !The reason for this is that forcing someone doesn’t belong and doesn’t fit in the peaceful teachings of Islam.

Now, as for Angels cursing issue,We can say that if on certain rare occasions, the husband shows a desire for sexual intercourse with his wife, and for some genuine reason the wife shows a hesitation (not refusal), and says and explains to her husband sweetly and calmly about the reason of hesitation on that very occasion then it is possible, the husband can be understanding and voluntarily and happily give indication for postponement! Here, because of the strong bond between the husband and the wife, if the husband is not displeased or angry, the angels will not curse his wife and neither will she displease the Almighty Allah. And Allah knows the best.

It is well know that forcing someone to sex in almost all cases goes together with bringing physical and/or emotional harm to a person, if a husband beats/scares his wife to force her to have sex, then he clearly abuses his wife physical and emotional. As she is not sexually excited, he could (and most probably will) damage the woman’s vagina or even cause vaginitis.The emotional harm caused to her by being hurt by a man, who legally, must provide, care for, and treat her well. (not to mention that fact that she loves him). In this case the husband will commit a major sin, he’s violating the sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh) and the law of Allah swt in the Quran:

There shall be no infliction of harm on oneself or others”. (Related by Al-Daraqutni, Ibn Majah and Ahmad.)

 

O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may take away part of the dower [money given by the husband to the wife for the marriage contract] ye have given them, except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and God brings about through it a great deal of good (Qu’ran 4:19)

• A Muslim husband is forbidden to harm or abuse his wife! He has to act kindly towards his wife:

Abu Hurraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah’s Apostle (may peace be upon him) as saying: “He who believes in Allah and the Hereafter, if he witnesses any matter he should talk in good terms about it or keep quiet. Act kindly towards woman, for woman is created from a rib, and the most crooked part of the rib is its top. If you attempt to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it, its crookedness will remain there. So act kindly towards women. (Translation of Sahih Muslim, The Book of Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 008, Number 3468)”
As we explained before, it is well known that forcing someone into sex in almost all cases goes together with physical and/or emotional harm, which is strictly forbidden in Islam.

A Muslim would neither abuse nor speak bad words to, nor curse others.’ (Sahih Muslim)

• the Prophet directed husbands how they should approach their wives, He said:“None of you should fall upon his wife like an animal; but let there first be a messenger between you.” The Companions exclaimed, “What is that messenger?” The Prophet replied, “Kisses and (romantic) words!” (Reported by Al-Daylami)
It is impossible for a husband who forces his wife to have sex with him (marital rape) to approach her in this way. How can an angry forcing husband bring romance (romantic words ,kissing) and love to his wife by forcing her into sex ? It’s obvious that a husband who forces his wife to have sex with him more resembles a wild animal then a romantic lover, the Prophet clearly directed to the husbands: ‘None of you should fall upon his wife like an animal’

Since we have proven that a husband can’t force his wife into sex ( he has to right to insist or demand, but cannot force his wife, if his wife refuses, her prayer wont be heard by Allah, if a wife repeatedly refuses her husbands request to join him in bed , then the husband has the right to divorce his wife instead of forcing his wife to sex , forcing a wife will only bring damage to a marriage relationship between spouses)

And also,The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) enjoined kind treatment and honouring of one’s wife, and he described the best of people as those who are best to their wives.

Narrated ‘Aishah:that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “The best of you is the best to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives, and when your companion dies, leave him alone.”[ At Tirmidhi Hadith 3895]

 

It was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbas that:the Prophet said: “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.” [Ibn Majah, Hadith 1977]

Finally I like to point out that Allah swt in the Quran commands ‘just behaviour’ and a husband should live with his wife ‘on a footing of kindness and equity’ , forcing a wife into sex /martial rape is clearly a sin and breaks Allah’s command ‘ live with them on a footing of kindness and equity’ , Allah swt will punish the wrongdoers and unjust people!

{O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may take away part of the dower [money given by the husband to the wife for the marriage contract] ye have given them, except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and God brings about through it a great deal of good.} ( Qu’ran An-nisa 19)

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